


The Words We Write

by Alex the Omega (Alex_Omega_442)



Series: Soulmates No Matter The AU [1]
Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Aaron Burr Has Anxiety, Aaron Burr is So Done, Adopted Marquis de Lafayette, Alexander Hamilton Being an Asshole, Alexander Hamilton Has Anxiety, Alexander Hamilton has Asthma, Alexander Hamilton has Trust Issues, Alexander Hamilton is George Washington's Adopted Son, Autistic Alexander Hamilton, Barista John Laurens, Bisexual Aaron Burr, Bisexual Alexander Hamilton, Bisexual Eliza Schuyler, Caring George Washington, Charles Lee Being a Dick, Confused Hercules Mulligan, Dad Friend Hercules Mulligan, Dom Thomas Jefferson, Flirty Marquis de Lafayette, Gay John Laurens, Gay Thomas Jefferson, Genderqueer Marquis de Lafayette, Human Disaster Alexander Hamilton, M/M, Marquis de Lafayette Speaks French, Mentioned James Madison, Minor Gilbert du Motier Marquis de Lafayette/Hercules Mulligan, Mom Friend Angelica Schuyler, Nonbinary Peggy Schuyler, Pansexual Marquis de Lafayette, Pansexual Peggy Schuyler, Past Alexander Hamilton/Elizabeth "Eliza" Schuyler, Peggy Schuyler is a Good Friend, Pure Eliza Schuyler, Samuel Seabury Being an Asshole, Stoner John Laurens, Sub Alexander Hamilton, Thomas Jefferson Being an Asshole, Thomas Jefferson Loves Alexander Hamilton, Thomas Jefferson and the Marquis de Lafayette are Twins, Trans Alexander Hamilton, Trans Angelica Schuyler, Trans James Madison, Trans Thomas Jefferson, Worried Parent George Washington
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-23
Updated: 2020-09-22
Packaged: 2021-02-28 22:54:04
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,447
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23275090
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Alex_Omega_442/pseuds/Alex%20the%20Omega
Summary: Alexander Hamilton, Strong, Hard Working, Loyal to a T, and Autistic. He held no shame in this fact it just meant he went about his day differently than most. Like keeping a schedule and routine. Avoiding Loud noises if possible. Getting upset when his schedule even if it meant not fighting with his rival, Thomas Jefferson, it messed with him. He's rather the fights than an upset schedule.Thomas Jefferson, Strong, Hard Working, Stubborn as a Mule, and a Dick. He knew he was a dick, knew he should change. He even started to be nicer to everyone, in fact, everyone except a little raven-haired bastard orphan, Alexander Hamilton. Sure he left most arguments in tears and sure it hurt Thomas to see him in such a way. But seeing him when they didn't fight hurt more. But Why?Is it that the poetic words that show up on up on body when his soulmate is stressed that seem to calm him? Or the way he could talk to his soulmate without ever knowing them? He wasn't sure until he met his soulmate during a bad storm that locked them both in the office.
Relationships: Alexander Hamilton/Thomas Jefferson
Series: Soulmates No Matter The AU [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1673707
Comments: 14
Kudos: 104





	1. A Day Like Any Other -

**Author's Note:**

> Notes!- Alexander's Autism is based on the authors! If you find it offensive or not like another persons sorry but it's based off my own experiences!

Alexander Hamilton, Strong, Hard Working, Loyal to a T, and Autistic. He held no shame in this fact it just meant he went about his day differently than most. Like keeping a schedule and routine. Avoiding Loud noises if possible. Getting upset when his schedule differed even if it meant not fighting with his rival, Thomas Jefferson, it messed with him. He's rather the fights than an upset schedule.

Thomas Jefferson, Strong, Hard Working, Stubborn as a Mule, and a Dick. He knew he was a dick, knew he should change. He even started to be nicer to everyone, in fact, everyone except a little raven-haired bastard orphan, Alexander Hamilton. Sure he left most arguments in tears and sure it hurt Thomas to see him in such a way. But seeing him when they didn't fight hurt more. But Why?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

This Monday morning should be like any other for Thomas Jefferson. He got to work at 6:30 am like every other day, a caramel macchiato in hand and a small bag of donuts in the other. Hamilton's office light was already on or it never went off he couldn't be sure but what he was sure of what the sound of Alexander presumably fighting with himself in the small mirror on his office wall. This was all normal, everyone knew these mirror yelling sessions were a way Alexander handled themself Sitting down at his desk Jefferson rolled up his sleeve and pulled out a purple marker before starting their daily routine of talking to his soulmate. He had learned early on that his soulmate got upset if this schedule was thrown off even by a millisecond. So exactly at 6:40, he wrote his first message.

_Good Morning Love, Hope Your Morning is going wonderful._

Setting the marker down briefly he opened up his laptop and thanked whatever deity out there that Hamilton had finally stopped yelling and seemed to finally calm down. Smiling he looks down at his wrist as dark green markered letters appear on his skin. Chuckling he remembers his first few times he wrote his soulmate how they had to figure out which color of marker was dark enough for him to read on his already dark skin tone.

**_Mornings fine_ **

Rolling his eyes he chuckles again. Someone's not had their coffee they're writing bluntly instead of poetic sentences. 

_Have you done your routine?_

Looking back at the computer he waits for a reply, he knows his soulmates routine from years of talking and it's become a part of it to ask if he's done it. While waiting for his reply Jefferson pulls up a shared document that holds a checklist. 

**_6:40 - Begin Talking._ **

**_6:45 - Take Medication (Actually take it, love)_**

**_6:50 - Get Dressed (Please Change)_ **

**_7:00 - Coffee_ **

Watching as each tasked gets a typed check he smiles. Glancing over at the time he sighs, It's 7:12 people would start to flood the office soon ending his moments of uninterrupted bliss with an unknown soulmate. Soon the dark green ink appears again this time with coffee-fueled poetry. 

**Good Morning my unidentified love till the day we meet these times of few words shall be my joy. Sadly I must bid you well till we speak at lunch.**

Sighing contently at the words that fill his arm he rolls down his sleeve to preserve the words till he washes them away later. Closing out of the schedule Jefferson opens his email to find he's been bombarded with emails from none other than Hamilton most going on about some new bill he's trying to pass while most are to just insult him or to start stupid arguments he had no time for. Looking at only whats important that's when he noticed a very sluggish Hamilton emerge from his office only to head straight for the coffee, how the man was alive with only a diet of coffee he had no idea. Wait. Since when did he care about Hamilton, if his lack of healthy habits killed him he wouldn't have to deal with his annoying ass anymore. 

Monday Morning was already going wrong for Hamilton. He had stayed in the office all weekend working, avoiding his friends and barely talking to his soulmate. Hamilton had to get his debt plan through. Avoiding his friends wasn't an easy task but being around them constantly wasn't either, they tended to be overbearing noticing every little twitch of his anxiety or the way his autism interfered with how a normal person did something. Like going shopping or even riding the metro. But the thing that killed him the most was not talking to his soulmate. Sure he'd never met them but that didn't mean he couldn't sit for hours and just talk. He could fill his body with their conversations and enjoy reading them a hundred times over till the dreaded night time shower. 

Sure he hated it but what he hated more was the upset in his schedule if he didn't take it. He and his soulmate had several shared docs full on his schedule. Morning Routine, Lunch Routine, Evening Routine, Night/Bed Routine, and Complete Routine. With his day sectioned into four sections, he managed it quite well unless something came along to ruin it like people, cough, Jefferson, cough, an unexpected attack or even sudden moments of overstimulation. 

Hamilton though he'll never admit it would rather have a civil conversation with Thomas Fucking Jefferson than have attacks or periods of overstimulation. These attacks could range from him having a sudden spike in anxiety to a full-blown panic attack with him shaking and hyperventilating. But he'd rather handle that than when everything was too much. Sounds, touch, the sound of his own breathing, of footsteps of people chewing gum or even talking and especially touch when even the feel of his clothes on his skin felt like it was too much. 

Chewing on his necklace while his mind wandered Hamilton almost didn't notice the purple words appearing on his wrist, checking the time he smiled. Right on time. 

_Good Morning Love, Hope Your Morning is going wonderful._

He chuckled only his soulmate would word the sentence like that. Wonderful or amazing instead of good or well. Honestly, he loved it he knew of no one else that phrased their words like that. Reaching for his green marker he fumbled a morning. 

**Mornings fine.**

He hadn't meant to sound curt but he was tired and waiting for 7:00 to roll around so he could leave to get his coffee. 

_Have you done your routine?_

Rolling his eyes he sighed. No, he hadn't, instead of responding he opened the doc labeled Morning Routine on his laptop and typed a check next to the first item. Fishing in his desk drawer he pulled out a small yellow pill organizer and dropped his pills into his hand before taking them. Hamilton despised taking his meds though he knew they helped. Typing a check he could almost feel his soulmates happiness as he changed into the spare clothes he kept in his office. Halfway through changing he looked in the mirror and frowned. Standing their shirt half-buttoned baby blue binder almost two sizes too small stands out against his tan Caribbean skin. Slowly and hesitantly Alexander pulled off his binder knowing in soulmate would be upset if they knew how long he had been wearing it. Though he had never told them he was trans or wore a binder. He kept off the topic of gender purposefully. 

Buttoning up his shirt and pulling on his hoodie he sat back down not giving to shits if he looked unprofessional or not he held no meetings today he could lock himself in his office. Looking at the schedule he sighed not yet wanting to leave his office to get his coffee he went ahead and checked the task off. Smiling down at his wrist he began to write his soulmate a wonderful reply till they could talk at lunch break. 

**Good Morning my unidentified love till the day we meet these times of few words shall be my joy. Sadly I must bid you well till we speak at lunch.**

Setting down his marker he got up and left his office and headed straight for the breakroom which meant he had to pass by Jefferson's office. Oddly his door was open and he watched Hamilton pass. Why? Pushing it to the back of his mind he grabbed his coffee and locked himself in his office. Today was a day like any other. So Far.


	2. The Unexpected Comfort -

Both men sat comfortably in their respected offices gladly ignoring each other for now. Hamilton's computer dinged first with the notification then Jefferson's. While Jefferson headed straight to the Cabinet Room Hamilton trailed in a few moments later. Hoodie off, a too-small binder in place along with a very upset look. 

"Gentlemen I'm very sorry for pulling you from your work but this topic cannot wait. "

Sitting at their tables across the floor from each other the Secretaries organize the papers already on the tables. As Washington starts the meeting Hamilton tries his best to focus to stay calm but he couldn't fully mask his discomfort. Shifting in his seat, rearranging the papers chewing on his necklace he tried so hard not to interrupt the meeting by causing a commotion. 

No one seemed to notice the antsy Secretary of Treasury besides of course Secretary of State Jefferson. He noticed every fidget, every paper shuffle, every time his necklace met his teeth. The only problem with this is neither could figure out why he suddenly felt like it was his duty to talk to the man in front of him when called on he placed his argument but when Washinton called on Alexander they both saw the way his OK facade shattered. His breath quickened as he began to shake. Tugging softly at the auburn locks and the white button-down he wore. 

The President quickly ushered everyone out the room but instead of listening to the man of higher power he made his way across the cabinet floor to the shaking man sitting there. Somewhere between all the people moving Hamilton had fallen into the floor where he sat curled up under his desk a blown manic episode in place. As Washington walked over the tiny man jerk away from the sound of the footsteps. Before George could do anything Thomas was crouched down next to the table the man was hiding under. Using his southern draw to his advantage he gently spoke. 

"Hamilton darlin' can you look at me" 

Room silent as Washington watched the exchange with a worried expression. Scared Hamilton would shrink further into the episode only to be released when charcoal eyes looked up to meet Jefferson's obsidian ones. Thomas smiled gently as he moved from crouching to sitting never moving closer to Alexander. 

"Can you tell me whatever is the matter?" 

Closing his eyes for a moment before looking back at Thomas his voice barely a whisper 

"Too much" 

He nods understandingly. 

"Alex, Sweetheart can you tell me whats to much?"

Shaking his head Hamilton curled up tighter knees drawing closer to his chest as he sunk further into his panic. _he's going to use this against me. he's going to hate me. he's going to find out._ That's when the utter panic hit him he'd never been ashamed of it but only Washington knew of his true mental issues. If Jefferson knew and told anyone else knew they could use it against him and get him kicked out of the government, he'd be jobless. Most likely homeless. Sent back to forgotten providence in the Caribbean. 

Thomas watched as Alexander's breathing sped up, his face pale and his shaking became more violent. Gently reaching over as not to startle the man he pulls him out from under the table talking with him as he does. 

"Alexander, sweetheart, you don't have to tell me anything ok? I'm taking you to my office so you can calm down. Is that ok honey?"

Keeping his voice even and sweet Jefferson waits for his response before moving him any further than from out from under the table. Once Hamilton nods Jefferson gently stands up with him a hand staying on his shoulders as he looks up a few inches at Washington. 

"I'm taking him to my office."

"Jefferson if you hurt him" 

"Alert his friends that's where he'll be. Tell them only Laurens and Lafayette are allowed in my office. "

With those few words, he gently and softly talks to Alexander while he leads him to his office, once inside he sets the man on the small sofa before closing the door. Noticing how he tugs at his shirt slightly he walks over to the smaller man. 

"Alexander, honey, do you want to take off your shirt? Is it too much for you?" 

Nodding than shaking his head more concerns hit. Jefferson could already use this attack as blackmail what would he do if he found out he was trans as well? Whining softly he curls into himself, jerking at the gentle hand on his shoulder Thomas squats down to look the trembling man in the face. 

"It's ok sweety, I won't look if you want to or is it you don't want to be alone?"

Contemplating the options given he whines again not truly ready to speak again. Slowly reaching out he tugs on Jefferson's sleeve to which the man gives him a small smile. 

"Alright, sweetheart do you want help? or can you do it?"

Focusing on the small buttons Alexander slowly but surely unbuttons his shirt his mind relaxing at the feeling of the uncomfortable fabric leaving his skin. Turning around to give him privacy Thomas slips off his own shirt laying it on his desk to reveal a magenta binder, turning around he sees the look of shock on Hamilton's face only to gain a matching one once he spots the baby blue binder digging into the smaller man's skin. Though features soften at seeing how the small act of getting off a bad texture seemed to calm him slightly. Walking forward he crouches down in front of the couch. 

"Alexander can you please look at me. I need you to do something for me ok?"

Nodding confusedly Jefferson gets up and grabs something before returning to his spot in front of the couch. 

"Alex honey can I touch you? I can see you're not breathing evenly and it worries me." 

Nodding again he uncurls some. Carefully as to hope not to trigger anything Thomas runs his hands over the waistband of Alex's binder. 

"I was afraid of that, Honey can you breathe? I need you to answer honestly please" 

After trying and failing to take good-sized breaths he shakes his head. Nodding gently Jefferson holds up a dark purple cloth item to Hamilton. 

"Darlin' can you touch this? If you don't like the feeling I won't make you but I would like to get you out of that small binder. Let you breath easier, ok?"

Reaching out and touching the fabric he nods actually quite enjoying the softness of it. 

"I'm going to step out now ok? If you need me I'm just outside the door alright love?"

Slipping his shirt back on he steps out of his office to let the man change. When finished Hamilton opens the door just enough to let Jefferson know he can reenter when he does what he see's shocks him. Alexander is curled up on the couch the deep purple binder set firmly in place and Thoma's suit jacket around him. Smiling he sits in front of him. 

"Alex honey? Why are you wearing my jacket? Do you like the feel?" 

Nodding softly he tears up. 

"I'm not mad. I'm glad you like it." 

Looking at the soft knock at the door Thomas stands only to get a whine out of Alexander. 

"Darlin' it's Laurens and Lafayette, do you want them in here? I won't let them in if you don't want them here" 

"i-in"

"Alright, if it becomes too much for you let me know ok love?"

After the affirming nod, Jefferson opens the door for the two men in which the sight shocks them completely. Thomas Jefferson is standing there shirtless a magenta binder bared with pride and a small Alexander Hamilton curled up on his couch in a new deep purple binder and a suit coat that matches Jeffersons. Walking into the office Laurens was the first to speak. 

"If you think you could take advantage of Alex when he's like this I'll beat you to a pulp" 

Keeping his voice low so he doesn't startle Alexander, Laurens all but whisper yells at Jefferson. 

"It's nothing like that. The fabric of his shirt was too much but he didn't want to be the only one shirtless so I offered to strip as well. It took some persuading but I finally got him into one of my old backup binders so he could breathe" 

"Mon Ami calm mon Friere wouldn't hurt Alex. He may seem, how you say, an ass but is truly kind" 

"Geez thanks and Laf we left France years ago you don't have to continue to speak it" 

Rolling his eyes Lafayette walked over to Alex. 

"Mon Chere, look at me. John and I are dropping off your bag then leaving ok? I am very sorry but we must leave" 

Eyes watery Alexander nods after ruffling his hair both men leave after handing Jefferson a small duffle bag. looking over the weeping man he walks over and sits on the couch to very quickly and very surprisingly have Hamilton practically on his lap clinging to the taller man. 

"It's alright Darlin' I'm here. "

Pressing his face into Thomas' chest he curls back up into a small ball. Reaching around him Thomas opens the bag his friends had dropped off. Filled with soft blankets and fabrics, he smiled softly when he found small snacks as a reminder to eat, soft rubber chew toys, and a pack of gel pens. Gently nudging him Thomas held the pack out to him. 

"Would you like to talk to them darlin' "

Once he was given a nod he opened to pack so Alexander could take a pen. Pulling his purple marker out of the suit jacket the other wore he looked at him arm apologizing mentally to his soulmate for not following there schedule. As he was about to start writing he noticed small green doodles fill his palm, his soulmate's way of alerting him. Frowning he began to write. 

_I am so sorry my love, I know how much of an upset it is when the schedule is not followed but I was helping a co-worker. However, shall I make it up to you?_

**_It's fine, I am calm now. I must ask you to forgive me though._ **

_Whatever for my darling?_

**_As we speak I sit curled in another man's lap. Though he had helped me through the latest attack I deeply apologize._ **

_Love you never need to apologize for such things. If you find comfort in him then i do not blame you. I am the one who should apologize for I can't be there for you._

Feeling the small sobs of the other man Thomas looked down one of worry on his face. 

"Is everythin' alright darlin'?"

Shaking his head Alexander looks up, only for his already doe eyes to widen when he catches a glimpse of color. 

"J-Jefferson?"

"Yes darlin'?" 

"Look at you arm" 

"Alexander, I'm writing to my mate i know there's color on my arm" 

"Then look at my arm!" 

Shit. 


	3. Please~

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Help

i'm back from a much much needed mental health break and i want to continue writing this but im having issues since i plan it too be much longer. If any of my lovely readers would like to help cowrite or have a suggestion of someone who would like to help please contact me on instagram @alexthefuckinggay. Thank you and Hopefully i'll have another chapter out soon for most of my works.


	4. Good News ~

Good news!! This story is being rewritten to be longer and hopefully and lot better! Once everything is ready we'll set up and post the brand new first chapter! This one is a bit different in starting but hopefully it'll be longer so you have more to enjoy! Thank you all for waiting patiently on this story and other! Slowly everyone will be rewritten and posted again so it's the best work that it can be! Thanks Again!! - Signed Alex.


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